I Don't Belong Here.

a humor blog from the trenches of suburbia.

I’m a huge fan of the self-checkout option at grocery stores. True, it minimizes the chance I’m going to interact with someone and get a story out of it—which is basically what I live for in public—but the time I get back by using the self-checkout is often worth the trade-off. The truth is, I’m …

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My daughter Josephine turned 10 this July, though based on her recent transformation, she might as well be 16. Without warning, the markers of her identity—the colorful bows in her hair, the sparkly pink t-shirts—ended up in the Goodwill bin. For years, Josephine was obsessed with JoJo Siwa, a ponytailed cherub who rose to fame …

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