I understand the basic principle of burping a kid, but truthfully, I have never felt so unequipped for a task in my entire life.
I understand the basic principle of burping a kid, but truthfully, I have never felt so unequipped for a task in my entire life.
Who’d have thought naming a new baby could be so stressful?
While a snow day means you don’t have to deal with other people’s asshole kids, it means you have to deal with your own.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year for losing your mind
Being a parent is not nearly as hard as all those mommy blogs make it out to be.
I’ve never been much of a Halloween guy. It’s probably because the street I grew up on wasn’t very conducive to trick or treating. There aren’t sidewalks, and the houses are pretty far apart, so it would’ve taken four hours to get down the street on my little legs. So each year, my mom would …
It started with two blue lines. Two blue lines resulting from bodily fluids reacting with a chemical strip. Melinda came into the bedroom, beaming, pushing this piss-soaked stick into my face. “Look, look,” she said. I had seen this exact scene play out in countless romantic comedies and sitcom plots over the years. It was …
Holy crap, this is my 30th post. Since November, I’ve birthed 62,300 words out into the great abyss of the internet. That’s a couple fewer words than The Sun Also Rises; 16k more than ol’ Scotty wrote in The Great Gatsby. While it would be the humble thing to say I write for myself, that …
I Don't Belong Here. 